Money Moron

My face will never grace the cover of Fortune magazine, and I will never be quoted in the Wall Street Journal. For me, reading the financial pages is akin to reading science fiction. My attitude towards wealth was always “If I can overeat, I am rich.”

This mantra hasn’t turned out well for someone in the final third of life, so I have had to re-educate myself by quickly reading a lot of books and websites about money management, and watching movies about Wall Street like The Big Short.

Here are some things and people I read about:

Quants; FAANG; Blockchain; Bakkt; Dark Pools of Liquidity; CDO’s; Unicorns; Dry Powder; AI and Deep Learning; Strategic Inflection Point; Mezzanine Debt; Value Extraction and Value Creation; DOJI; Candlestick Formations; Rule of 72; RoboAdvisers; Trailing and Forward Earnings; EBITDA; Initiating Coverage Reports; Economic Moats; GAAP rules; Jack Bogle; PMI’s; Norbert’s Gambit; VIX; SMI; CASS Freight Index; Keynes ‘Animal Spirits’; Secular Bottom; Price to Value Ratio; Debt to Equity; Currency Risk; Yield Curve Inversions; Tranches; High Frequency Traders; 10K Filings; Net Global Equity Supply; Buybacks; The Dumb Money of Muppet Clients; Market and Limit Orders; Interlisted Stocks; Credit Default Swaps; Intrinsic versus Book Value; Repo Market; Hedge Funds; Shiller P/E Ratio; CDS Index; Elliot Wave Pattern; Quiet Bull and Volatile Bull Markets; Plunge Protection Team; EDGAR; DSCR; SWOT Analysis; Value Trap; Major Angas; Fred C. Kelly; Bear Raiding; FINRA; Event Risk; Shadow Banking; Zombie Banks; Tracy Alloway; Rehypothecated; Alpha and Beta; Look Through Earnings; ROE versus EPS; Max Keiser; Charlie Munger; Flash Boys; Baltex Index; Greenmail; QE4; AAII Sentiment Survey; Brad Katsuyama.

And on and on it goes down the rabbit hole.

My conclusion: I don’t have the energy or the brains to be rich.

3 Comments

  1. Wait … what?! There are Zombie Banks? They need currency now? For what? New rags? Listerine? New limbs?

  2. I’d love to comment but I am still falling down the rabbit hole. The white rabbit has plummeted by as I drift down…he had a $20,000 suit on, carried a $5000 briefcase and was yelling buy, buy…sell, sell into his gold Apple watch. You certainly have the brains to be rich but your soul is already rich so why waste your life on fripperies.

  3. You are wrong…Rich isn’t about money but rather compliance. If you are happy with your life and with your friends then you are truly rich

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